My children love Nutella so much they can polish 1 huge loaf bread in one sitting.  I try to referee and place myself in between the Nutella and their eager hands, all excited to dip and slap that all chocolate goo.  I try to put Nutella sparingly, partly because of its bad rap on calories but also because Nutella is a tad expensive here compared to local bread spreads.

So I bought a huge jar of Nutella from Robinson’s Supermarket and was shocked to learn from my eldest daughter that we had ran out of spread.  I looked and found the jar empty– yes empty.  In 3 days?  Something fishy is going on… So came another weekend– grocery day is now Sunday, and my children begged for Nutella again.  So I grabbed second jar for the month…  and after a few days, I found my Nutella culprit.

One early morning,  I was busy working and I heard someone getting a spoon in the kitchen– then silence.  I gazed suspiciously towards the kitchen and there was no sign of activity.  Hmmm. I walked towards the kitchen and found my youngest daughter, holding an opened jar of Nutella and eating the spread! OMG!  Anyway, I snapped a picture on her and got this.  lol

This brought me back memories, when my sister and I would sneak into the kitchen with a spoon to eat peanut butter.  I did not have the heart to get mad at her.  I just hunched over and dipped her spoon again and I took the jar from her and return it on the cupboard.

Are you on Twitter?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Coke, coke, we want coke!  With ice to the brim!

The school year is over and the children are all around the house and I wonder how I can get to finish all my work this time around.  So here are some of the things that I need to do before the week ends:

1- Plan and create activities for the children everyday.

2- Look for paid activities during the summer break.

3- Plan for Pascalis’ 9th birthday.

4- Plan for a short break probably to Cebu, Boracay, Davao or Bohol.

5- Check the video store and buy tons of videos for the children to watch during the break.

So what’s on your calendar for the summer?

Are you on Twitter?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

I hardly remember my mother now.  But certain things, a smell, food, and certain sound triggers some memories and I am reminded of her.  How she smiles, how she laughs and the food she cooks.

She died of pneumonia which was caused by her heart ailment.  She has endured an open heart surgery at the age of 32 as well as a lifetime of paralysis.  Her last months on earth was not very comfortable.  She spent months in the hospital shivering and whimpering and as my older brother said, she spent hours hanging to her cellphone hoping she’d receive a phone call from me and my sister.

During that time she was in pain, I was also undergoing one of the most painful times of my life.  I never knew she was dying, and when my children and I were on our way back home, and in transit in Bangkok, she had quietly passed away. Looking back, I sort have  understood and taken this as a sign that she knew I was coming home and on my own way to recovery from a very painful separation from my husband and the breakup of a seven year marriage.

I dealt with the death of my mother swiftly, knowing and recognizing the fact that death was inevitable and that she was finally home on the other side.  Do I believe in heaven and the concept of life ever after.  No.  Although born and raised by staunch Catholics, I believe that death is a finality and end of life.

My brother’s death was sudden.  He died at the age of 42.  His death was more painful to me than my mother’s since he was healthy and all of a sudden had myocardial infarction while on a meeting with colleagues.  He even called me hours before he died. Demanding me to see him at Makati Medical Center, and to bring food.  Looking back, I thought it was hilarious and was laughing as I prepared a cake for him the next day and my husband and I picked up his wife, Luchie who was on her way from Mindanao to see her husband who when we got to Makati Medical Center was already in ICU and was not expected to live. I was in shocked but the thought of death never came to me.

He died with me, my daughter, his wife and my husband on his side.  He made one long gasp for air and died.  His chest went to high up and he sort of reached up for some invisible hand.  He died peacefully and I was in shock and saw the grief and look of his wife, Luchie and I can only imagine the pain she felt.

While the death of Joemen was unexpected, my mother’s death was a gift.  Her death has finally ended her physical pain.  Her death has brought her relief and to the people who was looking after her.

So how did I get over the deaths in my family?

Acceptance eventually come. Handling grief is the most painful hurdle.  Transition difficult and painful.  I handled some of the death arrangements.  I took care of her things and which of her things to give away.  I kept some of her things, but I eventually gave her clothes to charity and her bags and shoes to relatives who wanted them.  Parting away with the material things she held valuable and kept was not very easy for my father.  He wanted to keep everything.  I had to wrangle and rationalize with him that while my mother’s things give him comfort, the fact remains that he had to deal with her death one way or the other.  The fact remains that she is now gone and we are still alive and we needed to continue living.  She would have wanted us to keep going on and it gives a smile on my face whenever I am reminded of her funny laughter and her addiction to telenovelas.

I treasure my memories.  My mother has been through so much pain and adversity.  I teach my children about the normalcy of death and how it can come swiftly to people who are healthy and young.

Don’t forget that you are still alive and you need to focus on the tasks at hand.  I remember that when my mother died, my father seemed to have lost his purpose.  Once he has accepted the death and the finality of Mama’s death, he managed to move on with his life now and continues to enjoy life without her.

Think about it this way, if your parent was still alive, would she or he want you to do this on yourself.  Most likely not.  Life went on for me, and the death of a love one is just one painful episode in your life. The loss feeling of loss will fade and you will eventually find and refocus your life once you have accepted the death of a loved one.

Death is part of life and it comes and it goes.  Life goes on for those left on earth and it might be unbelievable for those who has just lost a loved one, but we eventually will feel better.  The pain will cease and the memories of pain will come to bay and eventually fade.

Are you on Twitter?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Anyway, to make it worse, I took the digital camera with me without the batteries… DUH…

I also took the opportunity to drop by digitalhub to seek the help of an Apple Technician.  Well, it was confirmed that my adapter was indeed fried and I needed to replace it.

It cost me

P5990

What a pain!!!

Good thing I had some cash with me (recent earnings) and managed to buy the replacement.  Not only that, I took my children out for dinner in the local chicken place for dinner.  It was a blast.  It would have been great if I had taken some photos, but without the batteries… well, forget it… what is important was the kids had a great time and I did too.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Childhood is the kingdom where nobody dies. Nobody that matters, that is.

Edna St. Vincent Millay (1892-1950), U.S. Poet

I had a very interesting night. My second daughter asked me a striking question. “Will I die also?” Ofcourse the question did not come out just like that. It started with the conversation about rats and how we needed to keep our house clean so rats will not feast on our crumbs in the kitchen and bedroom (as my children has the habit of taking bread, biscuits and whatever snacks inside the room).

Then the other day, we were welcomed by a dead rat in our living room. It was a sorry sight. We shrieked first then I needed to clean it out, so I took the dustpan and swept the dead rat into it and threw the rat in the garbage pile. It was not very difficult to explain the death of the rat since it was obvious that the cat did it because there were puncture wounds on its body. I explained the possible circumstance and the children accepted it. Until—

Anyway, while we were getting ready for bed, she asked me, “Will I be in high school or college when I get old?” So I said, technically that would not be old, but you would have aged more then. Then, she asked, “But will I die when I get old?” I was stunned for awhile and choosing my words carefully I said “You actually do not have to be old to die. Because some people actually die young.” Then she suddenly started crying and saying, “I do not want to die, Mom.” I was shocked, and I hugged her and then she said, “God, please I do not want to die.”

I said, “Nobody is dying, Ba-ba.” My children has actually experienced death recently as my mom has passed away last November. Though my children had not been in the funeral, they are very much aware of death in the family, as my brother had also passed away years ago. I thought, “Now, how do I explain this to a child?” I mustered enough courage and said, “If we take care of ourselves, and no accidents happened, we will not die.” I also added, “Everybody WILL die. Mommy will die, Daddy will die, one day.” She wailed and I wanted to take my words back, but thought, “What the heck? Let her hear about death from me, rather than from others.” I said, “we certainly cannot control everything in our lives, ba-ba. Sometimes, people die because of illnesses… like Lola, who died because of heart complications, or Uncle, because he smoked alot and it gave him alot of problems and he died because of that.” “Also Daddy’s Dad died of old age, but he has been sickly for a long time…”

She quieted, and she listened intently. I was stroking her face as I explain along, and while my oldest daughter listens quietly. I also stressed the importance of taking care of ourselves by eating the right food, and avoiding circumstances that might lead to death or accidents. Or even taking proper medications so we will not become too ill. She then asks me, “Mom, do not let me die.” I cried then and told her, “Baba, I will try my best.”

Looking back to my exchange with my little one, I thought I was right and I was very open to her about the aspect of death. I am happy she had voiced out her questions to me that meant to me that my daughter trust me enough for her to ask about the subject of death. I had to think back hard if I had the same experience as a child. So far, I cannot remember any instance that I had asked, but my experience was different. I was not exposed to death, when I was young. My brother died a few years ago. My mother died months ago. My husband’s dad and sister died a few years ago also. So the subject of death came early in our family. I think though it is morbid, but death will always be a part of living. It is a part of life and no matter how much we try to avoid death, it will come, and when it will, most of the time, the people who mattered to us will not be ready at all…

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Here are some tips in studying with your toots:

1) Prepare for the exam two weeks prior.

2) Prepare notes for all major subjects in case she needs to familiarize and memorize alot of facts. This is actually important. I have actually started to teach my daughter how to memorize important facts for example in science, by using mnemonics and acronomyms for easy memorization.

3) Make dummy tests. In my case, I like to prepare 2-3 dummy tests. Mostly I use the first dummy test to check the readiness of my daughter. From there, I tailor the second dummy as a review and ensure I include the ones where she can get high scores to encourage and boost her confidence. Once she is confident, I can give her the hard dummy test.

One of the things I have learned in school through the years in UP is the wonders of simple note taking. I started teaching my daughter the habit of making her own notes rather than copying her teacher’s board work. I have also taught her to study and read ahead, then make notes so she can familiarize hereself and perhaps memorize the important facts as she go along.

However, one of the most important studying style that I found effective with the children is the intermingling or inclusion of important topics in science or whatever subjects into daily conversations. My daughter, I found, seem to retain more information this way.

For more information about studying and helping children improve their habits, click here.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

When my children were admitted, the personnel in the emergency room refused to accept our HMO and refused to admit my children without downpayment of P10,000. My cousin whose father is a good friend of the owner of the hospital convinced the cashier not to charge with the guarantee that my HMO will cover the hospital bills. She looked at our card and shrugged that my HMO is not accreddited with their hospital.

Luckily, my children and I are insured and our HMO is international and is accepted anywhere in the world. Unfortunately, the small private hospital in the city refuses to make the effort to check our HMO and insurance coverage just because they are unfamiliar with the insurance firm and they needed to call an international number to verify coverage.

It took me half a day just to convince them to call and only 2 calls to my husband’s company to seek their assistance to contact the insurance company since the hospital refuses to call them since they’d have to use the international toll free number. You could only imagine my despair and anxiety since TWO of the children were admitted and though the hospital bills will not be as expensive as the hospitals in Manila, the fact that I do not have money pouring out of my ears makes this recent hospitalization a heart throbbing, mind boggling and headachy experience.

Our coverage is comprehensive. When I delivered my youngest in a small international hospital, out in the southern province in Thailand, my delivery and all check ups were all covered by the insurance. It did not take them long to get a Letter of Guarantee and everything was covered, no money out for me.

My husband’s company told me that the hospital should email the HMO and they will respond immediately in a matter of minutes, but when I asked the hospital if they have internet facilities, they said they have no internet. What?! No internet? Not even dial-up? Anyway, so it was non-existent, so I had to convince the hospital administrators to call my husband’s company so they can more or less convince my hospital that we are indeed covered.

All these haggling and convincing took me out of my daughter’s room for almost half a day in total. I kept on going in and out of the room just to make sure the hospital is making their effort to contact my HMO. Good thing my HMO in Antwerp called the hospital after my husband’s company called them to call the hospital and send them the precious Letter of Guarantee. I could not believe I had to go to all of these nonsense when in Manila we have charged more than what was charged here, and our HMO covered everything. It made me think of other people whose family members are hospitalized and they have no HMO or even with HMO that are not recognized by hospitals. How about those patients who doesn’t have the means to pay their mounting hospital bills? It reminded me of the documentary Sicko, by Michael Moore, wherein he showed how the socialized health care of countries like Canada, France and Cuba differs from the health system in the US.

Watching how the uninsured American struggle with system seem so pathetic compared to the health system that the Filipinos currently have. Makes me laugh remembering my father’s relief when some of my mother’s hospital bills were shouldered by PhilHealth. What if the regular Filipino knows that in Canada, people can go to the hospital and be treated fairly for free at all times? I can only imagine the happiness of Filipinos in Canada are experiencing. No need to put downpayment in private hospitals. No need to plead for doctors to give you discounted professional fees… I wonder, would our health system improve like that of France and Canada? In my dreams, perhaps…

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

What else is new? My children have the same medications only on smaller doses… What I find amusing was the fact that my cupboard is starting to look like a mini-pharmacy already.

Does anybody want some?

Powered by Zoundry Raven

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

My children were very resilient. They went back to their schedule, made friends, and meeting more cousins. I think having the right combination of children their age to mingle with and meeting children who had gone the very same path they are undergoing now helped. I have a cousin who had separated from her philandering and abusive husband 7 years ago. She looks at me knowingly and helps me with my children mostly as she know the changes and transition is more crucial with my children.

She had been my “shoulder to cry” on and we swap horrid and sordid stories about our husbands and we both thank God we are not with them in agony anymore. Though my story is more different that hers simply because I choose to leave my husband while she was forced to leave hers by her family. Enough of the sordid details of my life… how’s yours?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.