By night an atheist half believes a God.

Edward Young, The Complaint, or Night Thoughts on Life, Death and Immortality

In front of the house we are renting is a House of Praise. I call it such because they sing with glee each Friday and Sunday of the week. It is actually a ruckus to some, but to me, I welcome the lively singing of songs of praise. Not those songs the Catholics like to sing. Ie. song of forgiveness and sinfulness, etc, but songs about being alive, thankfulness and rejoicing. I love the drums and the upbeat music. It stirs up my soul and makes me wonder why I am not with them and here inside my house. What is up?

I was born and raised Catholics by my parents. My siblings and I were all raised in a household where all rooms have altars and statues of saints and gods. I knew nothing less but what is being taught in the house and in school since we all went to private secular institutions. We went with people who belonged in the same church and went in the same circles.

My parents belonged to a prayer group for awhile, which means people come and go into our home to pray and eat– at least for a young child that is what it appeared to me. When I went to UP for college, I was exposed to other students from everywhere. It dawned to me how cloaked I was in the province being that I was sheltered and had no knowledge about other people, other cultures and other religion nor have any idea how to interact with other people raised in other cultures.

Having taken Philosophy in college with the hopes of proceeding to law. The course was like manna from heaven for me. One of the graces from Philosophy that I got were the fact that it had helped me bring focus my spirituality and beliefs in question and then strengthened. Not only can I justify my own stance and belief in that Being, but the fact that I am able to understand thoroughly where the belief that I had been raised to was from, and the fact that I was able to sculpt my own beliefs.

In the university, while my classmates gladly called themselves, atheists, I gladly called myself an agnostic. This is the belief that it is impossible to know whether or not God exists, while an atheist does not believe in God or deities. Yes, it is impossible to know God exists. In reality, the chrisitian movement was based on stories. It is up to us to either believe in the stories, and I happen to believe in the merits of the stories. Simply because it does make sense. However, I am very selective on what to believe and what not to believe. I believe in world order. I believe in limits and restrictions. I believe that we should not lie, covet, and not steal. The need to respect other people’s bounderies and beliefs is also important. These are some of the ethics I want my children to learn.